I’m thinking about buying a new couch. I’m thinking about buying a tea kettle. I’m thinking about buying a jumpsuit, maybe black denim overalls. A plane ticket to Poland?
Summer of mirrors. Something like me, maybe you, the world, trying to be honest with itself. No one really wants to turn the mirror—it’s too shocking. I think I felt embarrassed with my therapist today a few times. But I’m rationalizing that that’s part of the job, for both of us. Then I worked. Then I biked to Home Depot to get paint. I forgot Home Depot is canceled. Actually, that’s a lie. I remembered on my way there and still went. I needed paint for the living room wall. I thought it was called Sherwin Williams “Needle in the Hay,” but turns out it’s actually Sherwin Williams “Knitting Needles.” Not my first choice. It sucks everything is an advertisement. But I think maybe when people read stories even two hundred years ago they wanted to borrow people’s personalities, too. We’re complex beings—so much unraveling, exploring, creating, we’re all looking or not looking to do. After the errand I did my laundry, turned on the recommended jazz album, opened a bottle of wine. Now I’m cooking a steak dinner for one.
